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Master of the universe...
- 26 Feb 2007 09:00
The Waterfront's agony uncle Jamie answers more of your questions.
As a magnet of female folk, like yourself, I am in desperate need of suggestions on how to keep them all at bay.
Advice please...
Tell me about it! All this female attention is rather distracting! If only I could attract iron filings, now that would be cool! Like that guy off of that film, X-men! The problem is that I understand iron filings and I don't understand women. Women aren't like iron filings. I just thought I should do my public duty and inform everyone of that fact.
If the problem really is as bad as you say, I sympathise (actually, I'll admit I'm a tad jealous). Do the police sell second-hand riot shields? If not, they'll be available in Tesco Value soon enough, they have pretty much everything else!
Love Jamie x
How can I become the master of the universe?
Isn't there a How to be the Master of the Universe for Dummies? I know they have plenty of books in the series, including the very good How to Convince People that You Really Aren't a Geek, Honest! for Dummies and I'm on the second chapter of Conversing with your Fellow Human for Dummies. I suggest you take a look for such a book. Or the internet: everything's on there. Keep in touch; let me know how you're getting on.
Love Jamie x
St David's Day is fast approaching; I wondered if you had any good Cawl recipes, perhaps handed down your family through the female members? Also, can you help me make a decision regarding which emblem one should wear on said saint's day: my thinking currently is that although a daffodil is more pleasant on the eye and of course, nose, a leek is considered by most to be more traditional. What do you think?
With our family, Cawl isn't so much a tradition as a way to use up all the vegetables that are about to go off! There isn't really a recipe, you just slice loads of vegetables, throw them into a water-filled pot, put it on a hob and boil it. This is more tricky than a microwave meal, and yes, I did need a bit of practice, but I got the hang of it in less than a month of trying.
Daffodil or leek? A leek is heavier and harder to wear than a daffodil, though that never stopped mum pinning one to me in primary school. Things became much easier when mum bought me an artificial leek pin-badge, which I've worn proudly ever since.
As a staunch red-blooded Welshman, I'll have to be traditional and plump for a leek!
Love Jamie x
Do you think Easter is all it's cracked up to be?
Well, I think it's an important time of year. It's not some 'night out' that can be 'alright'! I'm not even sure I should dignify that question with an answer! To some it's a religious festival, to some it's a symbol of rebirth, so yes, I think people would be quite upset if it wasn't all it was 'cracked up' to be!
Love Jamie x
have a problem; I have become addicted to chocolate. It started at Christmas. I was bought a chocolate fountain and a lot of yummy chocolate which I demolished with glee. Valentine's didn't help, my flatmates and my boyfriend all bought me chocolate and Easter isn't looking good. I don't think I'm going to be able to stop; there are so many excuses to eat the beautiful creamy delicious chocolate..mmmm...Help! I've got cravings again. What can I do? I haven't gone a day without eating a big bar of chocolate for months! (and I mean a BIG bar).
Chocolate fountains are, quite possibly, my greatest fear, so you'll understand if I find it difficult to answer your question. It's surprisingly difficult to type whilst shuddering. Don't get me wrong, I love chocolate, but I've still got about 20 Easter eggs from two years ago. I really should throw them out, but I can't bring myself to do it!
It'll be impossible to escape chocolate altogether, at least in this country. Perhaps you should go to America, I'm told they don't have chocolate but candy, which you may not like, therefore curing you. Think analytically, which is more difficult, relocating to a different country or trying to give up chocolate?
Love Jamie x
Until next time - Jamie x
Uncle Jamie